Tuesday, November 10, 2009

To Help or "Leave to Higher Power"?

Good News: This news may answer Melanies question about Barry acknowledging that he has a "Higher Power"?

Barry enjoyed his photo and this Unity Prayer of Protection caption, and asked me to send it to him on his facebook "wall" so he could share it.

The light of God surrounds me;
The love of God enfolds me;
The power of God protects me;
The presence of God watches over me.
Whereever I am, God is.

Also, I added one of my favorite verses: God did not give us a spirit of fear, but a spirit of power, love and a sound mind. Proverbs 14:44

I am grateful to be in the beautiful Blue Ridge Mountains in N. C. I have had a wonderful healing reunion with family - especially with Aunt and nephew. She is his great aunt, and has been rescuing him from trouble for a few months now. She really appreciated me taking him to Asheville for a Vipassana Seminar. I don't know how much he enjoyed the lecture and the Dhamma Brothers Video, but he really enjoyed the beautiful day on the Blue Ridge Parkway and in the N. C. Botanical gardens. I took him back to S.C. and came back for a one day sitting up here. I told Barry that if he finds he really wants to go for a ten day silent Vipassana retreat, I will support him.

Not that you are asking...but your comment prompted me to reflect on how useless it is to keep trying to change people. You can always lead a horse to the water, but it's up to him to drink it. As one turns such matters over to a greater Power, you can see that your role is not as pivotal as your ego once told you it was...This is my experience with the the toxic ex, for whom I just do the right thing and let her be as wacked as she wants to be. I am maintaining my equanamity by keeping the focus on me.

Let me know if such commentary is unwanted. One day I will learn to mind my own business. HA!


No, Anon, I appreciate your kind thoughtfulness, so please comment often in response to my ramblings. One thing, Barry is almost like a son, and is the last "blood" in family. And I did not put any pressure on him to do anything and he truly enjoyed his trip to the mountains - the Fall leaves are still out here in the South.
I am concerned about Barry and my Aunt. He dominates her and is out of jail only because of her. If it had been up to me, he would still be there as I consider him a danger to others and himself. And he got out without any conditions, which is doubly dangerous. I am going to call his lawyer and ask him how he could have done that. I feel like I am supporting my Aunt, by doing something to help Barry get out of his darkness.
I am committed to see the Divine in all beings, so how could I leave my nephew out. It is easier to leave my wife out (we are going through a divorce now, and she has reluctantly agreed to do it with peace and forgiveness. However, since she is sociopathic, I am wary of what will happen in court - there is no mutual easy divorce here - they all have to go to court - a shame, and court is backed up to next Spring.)

Here is one answer:

Everything we say, create, do, feel and think rubs off on those around us, and contributes to the Collective Human Consciousness, which we are in turn influenced by subtlely and grossly.

How we live, and what we consider acceptable or normal, reflects the precedents we have set for each other as humans - the consensus reality or status quo - from what we eat to what calendar we follow!

The values, behaviors and attitudes we received from our lineages, our families, as well as our friends and associates is ours to either follow or adapt, change, and evolve.

God asks us to share our wisdom with our fellow Humans to influence their free will. Obviously, the greatest way to influence is to walk our talk so that others receive the clarity of our authenticity.

It is our opportunity to inspire one another by modeling the values we have come to uphold. Our ability to influence one another is an essential factor in the realization of the unquantifiable potential for collective, ongoing, accelerated evolution of consciousness!

In sharing space with fellow human souls, we are ever-invited into deeper intimacy of recognition of the unity that ties us together with all of creation.

May we compassionately assist one another, that together we may do what must be done to help as much humanity as possible stabilize during these times of transition and Quickening. Let us love ourselves unconditionally and nurture one another's growth.

"I believe in the liberation of the human
through the exaltation of humanity-
that is, the realization of the innate
divinity of each person."

Theresa F Koch (Teri)


For me as a physician, I am of the sort that I could not continue to be a position of telling people what to do. That was getting ME sick! How dare they not listen to my advice!

In this case, I was not telling Barry what to do - he really wanted to go with me to the mountains, and was in a joyous mood, while in nature. At the sitting, since he was not an old student, he had to wait in atrium. At lecture, I went in and sat in front, which he did not do, and afterwards, I found out he sat in back.

HA! It was a ego thing, like we are supposed to have being akin to some god-like figure. Like I really have power over people. If anything I can just be a conduit of God's will, by directing in a proper direction for the person to act on.

It was not an "ego thing" for me, I am very concerned about Barry, but he was in his free will, and so was I.

The empowerment I get today is about self realization. Me, too

That I can share with another what my experience, strength, and hope might be on the subject. That is what Jeanne has done for us here.

This is what I was doing with Barry, with the willing voices of two other much "older" (like Jeanne) Vispassana student/leaders there in N. C.

However, the individual must be a seeker.

Barry, despite his problems, is very much a seeker. Unfortunalely, many alcoholics continue seeking "spirit' through spirits.

I am learning that one may be doing a disservice to deny another his due misery. Believe me, Barry is doing his "due misery", yet I am not sure he has really hit bottom yet, and that may because his Great Aunt keeps rescuing him.

<em>He may need that to grow in the path that God has set forth. Thus, I believe that unsolicited advice
(Barry and I have re-created a bond, and it was not "unsolicited advice")can be harmful, <em>when looked at in this regard. I think that is why they have us just sit down, and ignore others in the Vipassana journey.

Here is where I disagree, as I grow with more equanamity with accompanying more lightness, old friends and family are coming to me, and are asking me what is going on in my life - more solicited feedback.

One's journey is an individual thing. And so much communication can occur without all these words being exchanged. I thoroughly agree with this, and because of this, I am happy that I am being asked how I could have changed so much in last few months.

I'm not a fan of people stating how to do so and so. I AM a fan of one telling what happened to you, and how you made it through.

That last sentence describes exactly what has been joyously going on with me.

I feel that you are suffering in many regards: nephew, wife tripping. But you also have to see your role in it all, and just get out of victim mentality.>

Thank you, my friend, you have helped me get out of the "victim mentality" pointing me to the ten day retreat, etc. And with the support of meditating 2 hours per day, going to two support groups (ACIM & Tolles New Earth)and other workshops - especially the Ho'oponopono prayer, I am mostly out of egoic action and definitely "victimness". Reframing my paucity of inheritance to Divine Inheritance has really helped - "the most beautiful and best things in life are not things". I feel like I have a tool box of very selfhelpful growth tools, with Vipassana meditation being the strongest.

It is being shown to you that STUFF, which includes the cloak of people is just another thing to just caught up in. I'm sure my ex has yours bet hands down for insanity,(that could be an interesting bet)so I just eventually will have to just accept who she is, because I can't change a damned thing about her. I can just be an example of living sanity, and pray for her to get better somehow. I agree with this last statement, and I think she may get it that I want a peaceful, forgiving cheap divorce.

I hope this helps. I am going to bed--doing evening shifts last two days.

Good rest, my friend, I wish you the best and see your heart is into helping, thank you! ron


I didn't mention 'unsolicited advice' Ron, I was talking about rescuing addicts. The important first step in any addicts recovery (as the 12 step system that Alcoholics Anonymous use) is to acknowledge that there is a Higher Power than yourself. Talk to Barry about exactly this because if he can acknowledge it then he's chosen the path to recovery. That was how I got into all this spiritual 'stuff', it was part of my own recovery. Love Melanie X (not "anon")

Dear Melanie, "Anon" is not a crone and his messages were personal to me, and I prefer to not share his name.
Why is alcoholic "anonymous" anonymous?

Here is "anon"'s last comment: "You got it Ron. It's supposedly is happening the way it is supposed to happen. Take it easy."
and I think I will end this dialogue with that!
Thanks for your responses, love to you, ron

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