Changing Nightmares into Pleasant Dreams

January 31, 2010
Saturn, the planet of limitations, gets tense with Pluto, the planet of transformation. This tension brings up an issue from November, but do not expect resolution right away. Can you work to develop coping methods as you plan for a brighter future?
I only pay attention to the horoscope, if it can be helpful. A year ago last November was when my Mother had her accident. She went into the ICU and never recovered. I was up there with her, but could not understand the negativity coming to me from family and "friends" while I was spending more time in the hospital with her than anyone else. She was never to speak again, so she could not tell me what was going on.
At her funeral in late Dec., I was again puzzled and hurt on my negative reception by these family and all but one friend.
The reading of the will in Feb. shocked me into the worst feeling of rejection in my life. I have been working since then to change the news into a "divine inheritance" being helped by sayings such as "the best and most beautiful things in life are not things." And then attending a ten day silent Vipassana meditation retreat. Plus weekly support groups and meditation groups.
Recently, I was asked by my Aunt, who was one of the very negative people to come and help me with my addicted, alcoholic nephew, who was the most negative of all.
There he lost his temper one day in front of my aunt, threatened to kill me, but most importantly spewed out the accusations that he had been demonizing me that my Mom, my Aunt and the others must have believed. I have been forgiving that and this is what leads to my writing below:

Recently, I have returned to the scene of my biggest feeling of rejection, and like a "prodigal son", I have been accepted. However, at night, I awake usually with those same feelings of being a "victim of the world". I get over them by placing my right hand over my heart and repeating "God's love is right here, right now." And then I add the Ho'ponopono prayer "I am sorry, please forgive me, thank you. I love you". Even if I think I am right, I say this prayer as much as for myself as for my "enemy" , as we are all one anyway. My thinking is changed, and I wake up feeling much better. I read inspirational liteture (at least three "daily words", and then I pray/meditate for an hour if possible. My days start off brightly, and with an occasional shift in thinking, the day remains positive. I can see it in the faces and hear it in the words of those around me.

Comment by Arieljoy Fine I was talking with a friend about the practice of Ho'oponopono and how I have found it very useful as a way of entering into the Vortex (ala Abraham-Hicks). So I want to share that, and this insight my friend had. She said that she has changed, "I'm Sorry" to "I am Greatful". I have tried it her way and I really like it better. I found that when I was saying "I'm sorry", I have a tendency to stay stuck in feeling bad. But when I say, "I am greatful" I immediately begin floating downstream and all the resistance to letting it go simply disappears.

In Love and Light,
Arieljoy

Hmm, thanks, Arieljoy, I will try it that way, however I am wondering if if works for the person who "thinks you have hurt them." Even though I can rationalize their feelings of hurt as mistaken, or taking it too personally, or just plain wrong, somehow I must have created it. I am learning that I have to take responsibility for everything in my life, as much as I would like to shift it sometimes.
"No matter how much I protest, I am totally responsible for everything that happens to me in my life." Wayne Dyer (Your Sacred Self)

I will let you know if changing to "Greatful" makes a difference? .