Love Yourself Unconditionally First

J. says she has to have someone to unconditionally love her. I feel too much pressure in our relationship, as the dependency issues roll over into economic & physical ones too. ..

‎"True love does not come from finding the perfect person but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly." Jack London(?)


October 14Ron Alexander:
Yep, just got back from great music at Pawley's Island. J. is going a different way - perfect! Great Birthday!..
L:Brian went to roanoke today to sign up some kid. He's about three hours out but stopped to take a nap. I'm celebrating the birth of mu new drum tomorrow. I'm hooked on drumming. I'm going to white horse black mountain on Sunday for a drum circle. Let me know when you guys are having another and we'll see if we van make it.
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October 14L: Are you saying what I think you are saying? If so, you sound ok with it. You gonna be ok?..
October 15L:The birthing process is never easy Ron. Just love yourself and every thought and emotion that comes up. Embrace it all. I just went through it too. Hang in there and let the love in. Allow yourself to feel your pain. I love you and J. and wrap you both in divine love...
Ron Alexander
Thanks so much L. I am hoping that our relationship will transform to a peaceful loving kindness supportive friendship - today was a good start...in joy, ron..
L:The biggest thing that Brian and I have found is respecting eachothers viewpoint and not making it right or wrong yet at the same time being open to new or different perspectives. We can still get heated! LOL usually one of us getting defensive. The most important relationship is the one with self. When you get up in the morning look in the mirror and say to yourself, how can I best serve you today. Then give it to yourself. As we all learn how to nurture ourselves, we have more than enough to nurture others. Now leave yourself alone and just love all of the awesomeness you are. You guys are fine, one day at a time. I love you both!..

Ron:
That's some awesome wisdom, - think about doing workshops for couples...losalove, ron..
L:Thanks ron, it had crossed my mind along with many other ideas! Big hugs..



Ron Alexander: Live without pretending Love without depending Listen without defending Speak without offending
B: ‎^^i love this, Ron^^
Ron Alexander: Me too, B - dependency issues can kill a relationship as my friend Lisa Jones says "you have to love yourself first."
Ron Alexander: The photo depicts a Mother/Father child relationship not a equal interdependent adult relationship - "co-dependence" is toxic!

Even though I have read & heard about "loving yourself" first, it is almost an epiphany (really feeling it for first time) for me - that we can't depend on anyone else to unconditionally love us, we need to at least have the intention to love ourselves unconditionally!